Sunday, April 24, 2005
Paradox Is Getting Outrageous
Making a conclusion of my week was absolutely a terrible headache indeed, and my brain is literally a mess right now. Seriously, I'm too busy, too tired and too paranoid to remember what I have and haven't done. Life in this week was totally disorganised just because I was trying too hard to be organised, and I was a bit pissed by myself.
Too many things happened and I just can't take them all at once. I know I've fulfilled 95% of my plan that I posted previously, but the 5% leftover fill my stomach up 99% of anxiety about something very important that have not yet been done, feels like bad consequences are coming very soon. I figured out 1% is from me totally forgot a very significant person's birthday which is supposed to be celebrated a month ago; 1% is me forget to manage a meet up with Lezel for her birthday; 1% is from my undone Visa. The rest of the 2% is also known as some very important unknown issues...
And yes, I'm super paranoid right now, which is because I got stalked few days ago by a pervert. He stalked me to my building and managed to get inside the main building door while the door was automatically closing behind me. I noticed he is not a familiar face, and he realised I started to suspect too. Explained to me that he was living with his friends on the top floor was relieved me a bit but did not lose my caution at all. When I walked up to second floor, he began to go crazy and verbally harrassed me! I assertively asked to be alone, but he wasn't listening. So I gave him a second warning that I'll phone my flatmate out and confront with him, while I was taking my phone out of my pocket steadily. Then he finally back off, but still verbally threw out some really dirty sentences before he leave, which was fucking irritating.
I couldn't sleep and desperately need to talk to someone, but I didn't want to wake Kath up since she was exhausted and need to work the other morning. So I went up to internet and asking some friends online to stay with me... Thanks Wance and Ben for calming me down. I wasn't scared of that pervert at all, coz he looks like a loser that I'm definitely capable to beat his ass up, still I'm very paranoid and really noise sensitive. I know that I was very lucky that he didn't have a knife or gun, otherwise I'd be in dipshit.
Last nite I stayed in Hanna and Lena's place after come together festival at Luna Park, in order to be in the airport with aunty Kass on time to pick up my family. I wanna thank them here, for coming to the festival with me, being with me and letting me stay with them! anyway, it's good to see my parent and Uncle Bill again, but somehow my anxiety has silently invaded my guts. I know the reason why, but I just couldn't textually explain it here, perhaps I never put the effort to try.
So...my parent is living with me and Kath now, I'm glad that Kath loves my family so much. She said she loves how crazy and fun my family could be, and she keep saying my dad is super funny for some reasons. We did Yum Cha in the morning before visiting Kass's mom and her dad's grave, I think this is a chinese tradition (esp my family) to eat and reconnect with the distanced family as the first priority, regardless the uncomfortable overnight flight trip. We then headed to Chelsea for steak, they all love it and started to drink alcohol. But... they back home and sleep more at 8pm, while me and Kath went to see White Noise. It was a stupid movie with a very interesting idea, we think it would be amazing if they made a documentary for E.V.P. [3 out of 5]
P.S. Happy birthday to Lena and Lezel!!!
P.P.S. Shit, I guess my mom saw my tongue...
[[audio: Tegan & Sara - Speak Slow]]
Making a conclusion of my week was absolutely a terrible headache indeed, and my brain is literally a mess right now. Seriously, I'm too busy, too tired and too paranoid to remember what I have and haven't done. Life in this week was totally disorganised just because I was trying too hard to be organised, and I was a bit pissed by myself.
Too many things happened and I just can't take them all at once. I know I've fulfilled 95% of my plan that I posted previously, but the 5% leftover fill my stomach up 99% of anxiety about something very important that have not yet been done, feels like bad consequences are coming very soon. I figured out 1% is from me totally forgot a very significant person's birthday which is supposed to be celebrated a month ago; 1% is me forget to manage a meet up with Lezel for her birthday; 1% is from my undone Visa. The rest of the 2% is also known as some very important unknown issues...
And yes, I'm super paranoid right now, which is because I got stalked few days ago by a pervert. He stalked me to my building and managed to get inside the main building door while the door was automatically closing behind me. I noticed he is not a familiar face, and he realised I started to suspect too. Explained to me that he was living with his friends on the top floor was relieved me a bit but did not lose my caution at all. When I walked up to second floor, he began to go crazy and verbally harrassed me! I assertively asked to be alone, but he wasn't listening. So I gave him a second warning that I'll phone my flatmate out and confront with him, while I was taking my phone out of my pocket steadily. Then he finally back off, but still verbally threw out some really dirty sentences before he leave, which was fucking irritating.
I couldn't sleep and desperately need to talk to someone, but I didn't want to wake Kath up since she was exhausted and need to work the other morning. So I went up to internet and asking some friends online to stay with me... Thanks Wance and Ben for calming me down. I wasn't scared of that pervert at all, coz he looks like a loser that I'm definitely capable to beat his ass up, still I'm very paranoid and really noise sensitive. I know that I was very lucky that he didn't have a knife or gun, otherwise I'd be in dipshit.
Last nite I stayed in Hanna and Lena's place after come together festival at Luna Park, in order to be in the airport with aunty Kass on time to pick up my family. I wanna thank them here, for coming to the festival with me, being with me and letting me stay with them! anyway, it's good to see my parent and Uncle Bill again, but somehow my anxiety has silently invaded my guts. I know the reason why, but I just couldn't textually explain it here, perhaps I never put the effort to try.
Well, I'm very happy but have to admit that negative does exist in my mind.
So...my parent is living with me and Kath now, I'm glad that Kath loves my family so much. She said she loves how crazy and fun my family could be, and she keep saying my dad is super funny for some reasons. We did Yum Cha in the morning before visiting Kass's mom and her dad's grave, I think this is a chinese tradition (esp my family) to eat and reconnect with the distanced family as the first priority, regardless the uncomfortable overnight flight trip. We then headed to Chelsea for steak, they all love it and started to drink alcohol. But... they back home and sleep more at 8pm, while me and Kath went to see White Noise. It was a stupid movie with a very interesting idea, we think it would be amazing if they made a documentary for E.V.P. [3 out of 5]
P.S. Happy birthday to Lena and Lezel!!!
P.P.S. Shit, I guess my mom saw my tongue...
[[audio: Tegan & Sara - Speak Slow]]
